so, i'm coming down with a cold. a bad one. i feel like crap. so naturally, i get my ass up and go to work!

side note: i really really REALLY wanted to call out, but i needed to fill out my time sheet. money weights more than my health at the moment.

and what do you know? this week at my job is Staff Appreciation Week, and the powers that be chose to incorporate some kind of delicious, fatty, and great smelling food into every day this week. this morning, i walked into the main office to see 50 blue and white gift bags. "how nice" i thought. i then walk past the faculty lounge, and what do i see?

bacon, eggs, potatoes, bagels, and muffins GALORE.

"how nice" i thought. can you detect the sarcasm. because it's there.

i poured myself a nice hot cup of tea with splenda, and walked out to my morning duty post.

20 minutes later, i went to my room and heated up my breakfast, which was jenny blueberry pancakes and veggie sausage. it was very good, and i'm glad i waited to eat that instead of indulging in the spread.

December edit: so here is a picture of me from around that time so we can see what i'm starting with:

Weight Loss: 10.4lbs

May - Days 7 and 8

sorry i couldn't get to a computer this weekend, i was out and about and simply did not have time. sooo day 7 was a Saturday, so i went to the Jenny center to weight in....

I lost 5.8 lbs!!!!

i was ecstatic. i didn't expect to lose that much because my monthly came, but i was pleasantly surprised.

saturday was also my BFF's engagement party. dun dun dun!!!!!!!

my counselor told me that i could either skip my jenny dinner and dessert and eat half of my meal, or eat my jenny meal and just have a salad (minus the extra crap like corn and sugary dressings). everything was okay. i ate my jenny pizza before i left to meet them in the city. we went to a restaraunt called Iguana, they had some lovely smelling spanish food. when it came time to order, i ordered a caesar salad and a glass of pinot grigio, which was allowed because i didn't have my jenny dessert.

i was fine until the food started coming out.

the smells were captivating! i thought to myself "oh god, i'm going to attack someone for their chicken taquito!". but then my salad came out, and although it wasn't a huge salad, it was enough for me. i started calming down, and i didn't give into temptation and take anything i wasn't supposed to. i did have one shrimp from my friend, but it was steamed, not fried, so that was ok.

i ended up having a second glass of wine. i don't know if it was okay or not, since i ended up missing my midday snack. i made up for it in the end, because downstairs from the restaurant was a club. i proceeded to dance my ass off until 2 am.

sunday was a horse of another color. i had a sore throat, and all my muscles ached. i had to get up, because all of the bridesmaids agreed the night before to go see the movie Bridesmaids together. i ate my jenny breakfast, which was a scramble of egg, potatoes, and ham. i brought my anytime bar and a banana for my snack, even though jenny allows us to have a small popcorn as a part of a 'meal on my own'. i chose to play it safe and bring my own stuff.

side note: go see Bridesmaids, it's HILARIOUS.

May - Day 6 - B-fast, Lunch, and Dinner

so today i'm going to give you all of it in one shot, since i haven't had a chance to get on my comp until now.

Breakfast

so my day started off with this

an oatmeal raisin breakfast bar. it was sooo good. at this point, my favorite breakfast fruit is banana. i've combined it with my cereals, my french toast, and this morning. when i first looked at the square, it looked so small, i thought i was going to inhale it in 5 seconds. surprisingly, one bite was full of so much flavor and oats, i began taking smaller bites and it took me a while to finish.

Lunch

i forgot to take the picture, but i had a beef and cheese slider with a side salad. the slider itself was the size of a white castle burger, but the patty was 5 times thicker. to "volumize" it i added some lettuce, tomato, and my allowed teaspoon of mustard (no ketchup. *sad panda*).

so after work, i had my afternoon snack, some jenny cheese curls, and then headed off to the supermarket. here is what my cart looked like mid shopping.

so many veggies.

my biggest concern was how much i was going to spend since i pay jenny around $126 a week for my jenny food. i surprisingly spent $68 on all of my fruits, veggies, and dairy for the next 2 weeks. not a bad deal, when i used to spend $68 in 2 days on food.

Dinner

so once i got home, i started cooking my 2 cups of broccoli florets. i knew i was having chicken fettuccine, and i LOVE chicken fettuccine with broccoli, so my accompanying veggie was a given. in the end, i dumped the pasta out of the microwavable tray into this container. mixed it around, and we have...

mmmm

look at how yummy that looks! i enjoyed it. so now i have to eat my evening snack and go to bed.

onto day 6......

so...i know i was supposed to take a pic of my food before i ate it, but....

my bad

yea, i completely forgot. i hope that tomorrow will be better :-) . so that empty container once held my scrumptious salisbury steak and potatoes. the carrots are my veggie that i had to have with it (2 cups to be exact). honestly, i have always loved raw carrots. cooked carrots taste like baby food to me, but raw carrots?? mmmm-mmm. i have to say though, i was pleasantly surprised with the saliabury steak, because i've had that dish a long time ago and i didn't enjoy it.

speaking of things that i didn't enjoy in the past, i had to have cottage cheese again. i paired it with a cut apple, and i have to say, it tastes best with apples. any other fruit, i wanted to gag. with a red apple, it tasted fabulous. i'm feeling a little more confident now that i can actually stomach the cottage cheese. it's such a big part of the program, i didn't want to jeopardize myself. but luckily it worked out.

for dessert, i'm going to have a cookies and cream cheesecake. i can't wait!

May - Day 5 - lunchtime

what i've eaten so far:

for breakfast, i had jenny's multi grain hoops cereal with a cup of non fat milk and a banana. around 11 i had my first snack, which was another banana and a vanilla chocolate crisp anytime bar. i love eating bananas with this bar, the combined taste is yummy.

what i'm eating now:

mmmm i am savoring this cheesy potato and fried chicken bowl!

all gone!

sidenote: in the future, i will take a picture of the food before i eat it, lol.

i had it with a side salad, and some agua. i feel really full, but not gust busting like i'm used to. i'm already feeling a difference 5 days in. i have more energy to keep up with the kids at my job (i'm a school librarian) and i just feel good. i'm excited that i've almost got my first week down.

May - Day 1 - the beginning

actually it's Day 4...wait.... *sigh* lets start from the real beginning:

I AM A FOODAHOLIC.

that's me.

i'm a 24 year old woman from Queens, NY. i come from a family that loves to cook and LOVES to eat. i have been overweight ever since i was a teen, even though i was an athlete in high school, my eating habits were poor. just god awful. i love all the stuff you shouldn't have too much of; sweets, starches, heavy cheese, fried foods....shall i go on? and when i get my hands on any of my faves, i can't eat in moderation. i feel like i have to GORGE until it's hard to breathe.

i've tried several diets over the years: weight watchers (3 times), atkins, cabbage soup, low cal and low carb. i even got a trainer for 6 months (my wallet hated me for months). each time i started a regiment, i would have moderate success(the most was 30lbs) and then i would cave and revert back to my unhealthy lifestyle. but looking back, i can tell that i was never in it 100%. the most would be around 85% because i would occasionally cheat, but i never realized until it would be too late that i was cheating myself.

around a month ago, i started to feel really self conscious about myself. i began to see myself as a 24 year old with the body of a 45 year old. i was at least 150lbs overweight, i stopped going out with my friends as often as i used to because i didn't want anyone to see me like this anymore. i didn't want to see me like this anymore. and then it happened...

my best friend got engaged.

and made me the maid of honor.

i took the role because i love my friend very much and i know she'd do anything for me, just as i'd do anything for her. anything. and one thing i know my friend wants is for me to be healthy and happy. she being a weight loss success story herself, tries to get me to make good choices when we're out. in the past, i have chosen to do the opposite, not even considering the effect it could have on her maintenance. when i realized this, i felt so selfish. i know that she would love me no matter what i looked like on her big day, but i can't help but want to look healthier and happier as her maid of honor.

so, like i do in times of despair, i talked to my mom.

she told me that my grandmother had secretly been on jenny craig for 5 weeks, and she was having great success with it. it's funny that at that point, i had felt like i had tried any and everything to lose weight, but in actuality had completely forgotten about jenny! well i decided at that moment that not only am i going to lose weight for this wedding, but i'm going to lose weight for myself, and maintain a healthy lifestyle for life.

so last saturday, may 14, i went into a jenny craig center and signed myself up for a full year membership on the Metabolic Max program. my councelor is Michelle, and i love her. she totally gets me and is a great inspiration herself.

how it works:

they gave me my weeks worth of jenny food (3 meals a day). they include a weeks supply of anytime bars, which serve as your daily vitamins, and a yummy snack for each day. they give you a 'menu' for the week, which tells you when to have what. you also have to supplement their food with your own veggies, fruits, dairy, and allowed seasonings and flavor enhancers. so while they only provide you with one snack for each day, your fruits and dairy make up for the other 2 snacks you have to have.

how it's been going:

well i've been on it for 4 days now, and their food is DELISH. i've had beef chow mein, meatloaf (a fave), cheesy enchilada, and this morning i had french toast. i hardly find myself hungry (you eat six times a day for christ sakes), and i pee all the time. yes, i drink 64 oz of water daily. i also have eaten more fruits an veggies in the past 4 days than i have all year. my only problem is the incorporation of cottage cheese every day. to be honest, cottage cheese is fucking gross. sorry for the language, but you're going to have to get used to it ;-) i have tried several things to make it edible, and it simply isn't. i just have to choke it down and bear with it.

i look at this as a road to recovery, in a way. food is an addiction to me. i find myself getting a craving here and there. it's hard because i live with other people who aren't dieting, so i can smell no-no food all around me. but i think as long as i keep looking at this as a rehabilitation of sorts, i can keep my eye on the prize and succeed. (way to sound infomercial-like -_-)

on to day 5......